Attack of the Fitness instructor
Posted on Sat Aug 3rd, 2019 @ 4:30pm by Captain Charlotte Reynolds & Ensign Claire Lafayette & Master Chief Petty Officer Amelia Redgrave & Lieutenant Commander Kenna Wolff & Lieutenant Commander Maralen Seitha & Lieutenant Jace Eldridge & Lieutenant JG Morgan Lindsay & Ensign Thyra Sh'shraaqir & Ensign Colby Pierce & Lieutenant Ian Acainus & Ensign Samaire MacBride & Ensign Heather Pinknie & Chief Warrant Officer Abigail Larson
Episode 1: A Lesson in Humility
Location: Cargo Bay 2
Timeline: During the voyage
She was perky, blond with clear blue eyes that looked like the waters of the Aegean sea. Her skin was flawless alabaster and her long blond hair was pulled back in a bouncy blond ponytail. She wore the skin-tight fitness gear of tank top and bicycle pants to extreme perfection and her pearly white teeth flashed in a flawless grin. Her voice was saccharine sweet and there was no way her teeth were not capped with the perfect alignment and gleam.
Kenna eyed the woman, disdainfully and glanced around at the gathered throng of crew. Who had signed them up for this hell? She wanted that person's name and she wanted it yesterday!
The blonde bounced, there was no other word for it, forward. "Hello everyone!" she all but squealed her eyes lighting up with excitement. "I am Lieutenant Commander Sandii Hightower! And I have been sent by Starfleet Command to initiate the newest in fitness programs as designed by me!"
Kenna scowled. "Oh and what.."
"Uh uh!" Sandii wiggled a perfectly manicured nail at Kenna. "Do not interrupt me, I am a fully qualified Fitness instructor and I graduated top of my class at the Academy after completing my double degree in health and Fitness and Astrology at Harvard!"
"You got into Harvard?" Samaire asked dubiously from where she stood by other flight controllers.
"What? Like it's hard? If you couldn't get into Harvard sweetie, then I guess you are not smart enough." The blonde gave a bright oh so fake smile. "So let's all get into lines..." her gaze shot to the brunette who had last spoken. "Do I need to be more specific for you?"
Samaire narrowed her gaze, muttered something in Gaelic and moved to stand behind another officer.
Sandii continued as if she didn't notice the death glare. "So we are going to start with Starjumps! Like these!" And she demonstrated, her boobs bouncing perfectly in time with her jumps.
It wasn't that she was perky and extremely happy, that set off Maralen. It wasn't even that she was those things at 'oh, my god, it's early' AM. Hell, it wasn't even that she insisted that he exercise at that hour; sometimes he did that anyway. It was that she was so damned fake about the whole thing. She was like some neurotic chihuahua barking at them to follow her... except that the chihuahua was actually something else.
He disliked her immediately, but he had also been trained to not let those in power over him know that he disapproved. After all, it was never his place or his right to disapprove, much less say so... no matter how much he wanted to drop-kick this particular barking mad woman into the next quadrant.
A soft hiss escaped his controls before he slammed them into place. He did as instructed, hoping that the Nazi Chihuahua hadn't noticed the hiss.
Oh, she didn't notice. Sandii didn't have enough sense to notice. She bounced between the lines, correcting posture and well... bragging. "Admiral Miles said I was the best star jumper in my class, and Captain Kirk expressly requested my presence on his ship for the review of his crew fitness."
Kenna snorted and rolled her eyes from her spot behind Charlotte "That's Kirk alright" she said sotto voice "Likes his Tits and Arse"
Sandii bounced past the two blonds and smiled brightly. She studied Kenna for a moment. "OH, I see you have been augmented!" She beamed a smile at Kenna.
Kenna stopped jumping and crossed her arms. "Excuse you!?"
"Augmented." Sandii made movements around the bust area.
Clearing her throat, Charlotte made her presence in the room a little more known to the trainer. She wasn't about to have an official officer activity devolve into discussions of 'augmentation'. Especially, if their relatively clueless instructor was having that discussion at an officer who had to undergo reconstructive surgery. "Commander Hightower, can we have this little discussion later? I think people are anxious to get keep the class moving." And maybe it will mercifully end at some point...
Sandii beamed a smile at Charlotte, "Oh, of course, Captain, " she all but simpered and half skipped, half danced back to the front. She paused at a few male junior officers to 'correct their actions. She flirted with a few engineers and paused before yet another officer.
Morgan had already decided that staying anonymous in a situation like this was most likely for the best. Thus he had worn simple workout clothes and was buried in the pack, as he watched the drama play out though he could only chuckle and murmur. "That's a healthy young woman there. This should prove interesting."
"Hello" she chirped at Morgan as she fluttered her eyelashes. "You are doing perfectly."
Then before he could reply, Sandii was back at the front, "So next we are going to bend over slowly and touch our toes, hold for a count of 5 and then slowly stand up. Repeat 10 times." She demonstrated showing off perfect cleavage and her bright sunny smile.
That's when the doors open and Thyra walked in with a white shirt and pink sport shorts. She was wearing white sneakers with pink socks, they all matched her blue skin and white hair perfectly. She had a bottle of water in her hand. "Sorry I am late. Did I miss anything good? I really had to take this call...." She looked around the room. "And maybe I should translate it as well, the universal translator is broke." She turned around and wanted to walk back to the doors.
Charlotte felt herself reflexively leap at the potential escape. "Wait, Thyra is it impor..." But the doors shut behind the Comms Officer. "...tant." The captain finished her word visibly slumping. She apparently wasn't getting out of it that easy. She'd have to give Admiral Denovitz a piece of her mind for sending the trainer their way. She wondered if it was a prank of some sort.
Kenna gritted her teeth. At the front of the room, Sandii babbled along, giving them instructions. "After this ship, I was meant to go to the Artemis but after I met their XO, it changed. Can't figure out why that woman needs all the help she can get if she thinks she can keep a man.. and then there's the Captain he is drop-dead gorgeous, surely someone would have scooped him up by now. ah well, I can always call James and see if he wants me back on the Enterprise. Now let's all jog on the spot for 3 minutes!"
It would have required a level of self-control that Charlotte didn't possess to hold back the humorous snort she let out at the mention of their friends on the Artemis. Obviously, their trainer wasn't aware of the relationship dynamics on that ship. She had to admit, she had a hard time imagining Hightower being allowed on an intelligence ship like Artemis anyway. It took her a moment to realize she'd reacted audibly though, and she made brief awkward eye contact with Sandii before making a point of mimicking the running in place.
Sandii was completely unaware of why the CO snorted but instead came over to correct her running. "Knees higher Captain, you need to lift them higher so you get the best work out."
Kenna butted in. "You said you have a double degree in health and Fitness and Astrology at Harvard...what department did you train in at the academy...?"
Sandii bubbled back. "Oh, I majored in operations and security! Double major!"
Again the doors opened and Thyra walked back. "Actually, that translation isn't in a rush." She walked up to the front and stop in front of Sandii. "I believe we haven't met, I am Ensign Thyra Sh'shraaqir, communications chief." She said as bubbly as an Andorian female can be. "Are you the fitness instructor Starfleet command send?"
"Oh yes, hmm you need the exercise don't you?" Sandii blithely stated. "I mean you are obviously not augmented like that lady over there so you will need exercise that keeps your bust up and not saggy, I have just the routine for that."
Sandi took Thrya's arm and ked her to stand beside Ensign Colby. "Here, join in here." She prattled on and said "ok, now everyone its lunges time." Bouncing back to the front she demonstrated the lunge and as she did so, stretched her arms above her head and clapped her palms together. "In time now, and 1,2,"
Colby didn't want to be here, he preferred to exercise alone, but since this was mandatory, he looked at Thrya and shrugged....and started the drill. He looked at the instructor, "Am I doing it correctly?" He turned to Thrya, "Are we doing this right?"
Sandii bustled back over and flashed Colby a bright smile. "You are going perfectly. You are showing your friends here how it is done." She flattered him.
Ian had finally adjusted to monogamy and had gotten used to having Elias around. Now, suddenly, he wasn't. Off on some mission and God knew where he was now. Safe, Ian hoped and returning soon, he hoped even deeper. He had for several months, even with Elias's absence kept his eyes in his head where they belonged and not allowing them to wander where they shouldn't go.
In the past, he would have been fixated on the instructor's figure, but as he stepped inside he didn't have to fight temptation. He was there because the class was required. He followed along with the exercise, but for the moment was silent, keeping his comments to himself.
Kenna slowed and stopped. Nope no more. She was done. "Sorry, " not sounding the least bit sorry. "Still recovering from major surgery. Not supposed to overdo ."
Sandii pouted prettily at Kenna. "Oh? Did the Augmentation surgeon give you that advice?" She asked innocently.
Kenna drew herself up. "No. I was a host to an evil symbiont that tied itself around my brain stem and controlled my actions. I still have mood swings.." She let the threat hang.
But Sandii didn't notice."Oh you poor dear, it must have been shocked at the lack of intellect in you." So saying she gave the nearby males a winning smile and bustled back over to Lieutenant Burton, who she praised winningly about his form.
Colby stopped exercising and stared at Sandii. "I'm sorry Commander, this isn't helping me in any way. I have my own exercise routine that does more than what you teach."
Ian, having overheard Sandi's comments, stopped exercising and walked towards the woman, stepping right into her personal space. "Excuse me, Commander. I'd suggest you take back that rather derogatory comment you just made about a fellow officer. It's unprofessional and unbecoming an officer of your rank. She could probably file a formal complaint if she wanted and there are plenty of witnesses here."
Charlotte had heard just about enough at this point. Grabbing her water bottle and her small exercise towel, she walked up to the instructor. The woman was a bit above her in height. And muscle mass for that matter. Charlotte found herself genuinely wishing she was in uniform for this, and not in her 1764 Tank top and some leggings. But she put on her most commanding air and stepped in such a way as to interfere with the woman's next lunge. "Commander, I think we need to have a chat."
Sandii gave the captain a completely blank look. "Oh?" she asked totally innocently.
Morgan had been exercising.
He'd also been listening with keen interest to the entirety of the exchange with the fitness instructor as she applied what he could only hope was chaos theory to the crew of the Defiant. "Remarkable," he commented offhandedly. "It's almost like a crew stress test with a very unique stressor being applied."
A half dozen snippy remarks floated through Charlotte’s mind, and it took effort to hold them back. She held her tone flat. “If you’d follow me,” she replied, heading past the woman and toward the door.
Sandii bounced after the captain.
Kenna raised her arm formed a gun with her fingers and mouthed 'POW POW' at the back of the perky blond's head. She looked around. "Class dismissed," she ordered. "Everyone out of here before that bimbo comes back."
Ian walked over to the Commander, "I'm sorry that the, em, bimbo treated you that way. It was completely uncalled for. How have you been?"
"Fine thank you Lieutenant" Kenna replied calmly as she grabbed her warm-up jacket and shrugged it on.
"Are you sure?" Ian insisted, "I'm not just talking about her insults, I'm talking about how you've been since it happened."
Kenna paused "I am fine from that time also, I have been through far worse in my life. Thank you for your concern."
Ian wasn't quite sure he believed the woman, but it didn't take telepathy to know it was a closed subject. Good to know," he said as he turned around and headed towards the exit.
Colby walked over to the other end of the gym and started doing his exercises, ones he developed for himself that gave him the maximum return for the energy spent. His exercises toned the body. He didn't do the lunges and the other nonsensical things that so-called instructor did.
He went through his martial arts training routine the way it's supposed to be done...slowly, almost like a dance.
Maralen watched the captain and the madwoman leave, then turned his attention toward Wolff, but she was already being approached by Acainus, so he let her be and made good his escape.